Blame it on the economy, blame it on changing sexual mores, or blame it on
Rio, but whatever the reason, we've got a new phenomenon to talk about: DINS
- dual-income, no-sex couples.
The problem of low- or no-sex marriages is coming out of the closet, according
to the Wall Street Journal. But it's not clear whether the frequency of sex
in marriage has fallen, or whether we're just talking about it more, says Michele
Weiner Davis, a Woodstock, Ill., therapist, seminar leader and author of "The
Sex-Starved Marriage," which recently hit No. 3 on Amazon.com's bestseller
The Journal also points to research by Denise Donnelly of Georgia State University,
who found that 16 percent of couples fail to have sex at least once a month.
It's a pattern that predicts marital unhappiness and divorce, she found.
Yet Janet Hyde, a professor at the University of Wisconsin, Madison, says dual-earner
lifestyles aren't necessarily the root cause in low- or no-sex marriages. It
comes down to fatigue. Hyde and others found in a study of more than 500 women
and their husbands that homemakers reported just as much fatigue as employed
women. The notion that wives' employment causes celibacy may just be a handy
way to dodge deeper sexual problems, Hyde says.
The Journal also reports that women aren't the only ones refusing sex. In a
study of 75 married people in sexually inactive marriages, Donnelly found that
in 60 percent of the cases, it was the man who had stopped the sex. The reasons
cited ranged from extramarital affairs to demanding jobs, drugs, alcohol, or
The Journal went on to offer "some useful suggestions from the experts
on keeping the love alive."
Wall Street Journal, via CareerJournal.com