HR Strange But True!
October 29, 2009

Aliens, vampires, and zombies ... oh my! Halogen Software recently conducted a survey asking HR professionals to choose the most terrifying type of employees.

The survey defined 3 types of problem employees:

  • Aliens--those employees who no one is quite sure where they came from
  • Vampires--those employees who hide in the shadows and suck the organization's resources dry
  • Zombies--defined as those employees whose minds and dedication left the organization long ago

Only 11.6 percent of respondents cited aliens as the most terrifying type of employees. The remaining respondents were evenly split between vampires (44.2 percent) and zombies (44.2 percent).

Dealing with such employees can be a heavy burden on HR. The survey found that handling problem employees is the issue that HR is most likely to cite (35% of respondents) as the one that strikes fear into them the most on a daily basis. Recruiting and pay-for-performance issues (12 percent) were in a tie for a distant second.

The survey asked respondents for their worst HR horror story. Halogen chose the following as the winning entry.

My previous employer was a manufacturing company of almost 800 employees and we seemed to have a lot of interesting troublemaking employees. Since I had the honor of being the Sexual Harassment Prevention Captain for the plant, those were the ones I dealt with the most. I had two sexual harassment issues in the same week that involved people's butts (to have one was enough, but two!).

First, I had a male employee who got mad at another male employee who was working on the same line as him. The second employee turned around to ignore the guy that was mad and the guy that was mad leaned over and bit him on the behind. The biter actually tore a small hole in the guy's pants. This was a grown man with grown children and he felt the need to resolve the conflict by biting the other guy on the rear end???

As if that termination was not bad enough, two days later I had another employee who got mad at his boss. His method of conflict resolution--mooning!!! The guy actually unbuttoned his pants, pulled them down, bent over and (the best part of the story, I think) shook his bare bottom at his boss. His boss thought this was funny--it was another employee who witnessed this who reported it to HR!! Once again, how does a grown man think that exposing your behind at work is acceptable? Not to mention, someone in a supervisor role who also doesn't seem a problem with this behavior!!

Being Sexual Harassment Prevention Captain for this plant was giving me a ulcer----I have worked at my new job for almost 9 months and I have no stories from here that involve anyone's butt! :)

More HR horror stories from the survey are posted on Halogen's blog (see below).

Source: Halogen Software

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